Does all leadership come from loving three things: humanity, learning, and honor?

Rawlonda Arthur
8 min readOct 14, 2020

In class on Thursday October 8th, we were put into groups and asked to talk about our name and what it means. My group was filled with classmates who all had unique and complicated names, so we were able to relate to the struggles growing up that we all faces. Teachers pronouncing your name wrong, people spelling it wrong, even people saying it so wrong to the point where we just accept it. The professor said something that made me think, your name is how one identify themselves, so if you do not like your name, does that mean that you do not like yourself ? My answer is no, a name may be how society identifies someone, but that doesn’t necessarily mean thats how you identify yourself. Your name is given to you by your parents, and by tradition your last name is usually your father’s. You have no say in your name which is why some people grow up and decide to legally change their name.

When I was younger I had thoughts of changing my name because it was so “long and weird” compared to my friends. But as I grew older I realized that it’s a privilege to have such a unique name. Fun fact, Im the only person with my name in the world.

On Monday October 12th, I completed my Kallion assignment for this week and these were my responses. The first task was to spend 30 minutes writing about a person in your life, someone you know personally, that you would say has shown you the most and best leadership in the course of their life. How young were they when they first started showing leadership ? In addition to describing the specific leadership behaviors that this person has shown, include information about their education and upbringing, their physical appearance and style of dress, as you believe influences their leadership and anything else about them that may explain how they came to show leadership so well. Finally, in your sketch explain what areas of life you believe their leadership would be most effective.

My mom would have to be the person that I choose when describing someone who is in a leadership position in my life. My mom has been a role model in my life since the day I was able to comprehend her actions and she has taught and installed morals in me that I still cherish and abide by to this day. The way my mom carries herself has been a great example of how I should carry myself. I am a firm believer that depending on how you are raised, those characteristics and behaviors stay with you. I have seen how the difference in an environment can affect how a child behaves. In addition, not just the environment but parental teachings can affect how a child behaves. Every child is different so parents may correct their children in different ways. For instance, my twin brother is more hard headed than I am so his punishment used to be more physical than verbal. That is because he was extremely bad and tested my mother , compared to me who listened and acted on verbal warning so I did not need physical punishment.

My mom was not expecting children. She had just graduated from high school and was planning on attending college when she was hit with the surprise. Not only was she pregnant but she was pregnant with twins. She did not have the slightest idea how to be a mother but from the day she knew, she vowed to put her children first always and protect us from everything she could. My mom started showing leadership at the age of 19 when she found out she was pregnant. She quit smoking and realized she needed a job to take care of her child and herself. From a young age she has taught me so many valuable rules. For example the golden rule was treating others in the manner in which you want to be treated. That was one of the basic foundations on the playground and certainly one of the first things mothers teach. This means everyone deserves dignity and respect. Another lesson I was taught was to look at the bright side, no matter how much planning and preparation is involved sometimes things just don’t work out. My mom also taught me how to dress, with my physical appearance. She always dressed cute and comfortable but appropriate as well. I never saw her showing too much skin even when we went to the beach.The areas in my life where I believe that my mom‘s leadership has been the most effective is in my schoolwork. Even though my mom never attended college, she still is extremely supportive and understanding. There are days I want to give up but she always tells me that if it is easy it’s not worth it ,nothing worth it comes easy.

I then was asked to talk about a problem that you would like to have phronēsis (wisdom, forethought, or “knowing how this is going to go”) in solving?

At this point in my life, a problem that I wish I had phronēsis , also known as wisdom, in is knowing how to stop the spread of the coronavirus . The coronavirus has impacted the nation drastically in every aspect. Financially, educationally, spiritually and the list goes on unfortunately. This virus ruined my senior year and has already negatively impacted my freshman year in college. I was not able to attend and celebrate my accomplishments at prom , nor was I properly congratulated at graduation . The virus has killed thousands of people and a vaccine still has yet to be found. I would wish that I had wisdom and experience in this area so that I could speed up the process . In addition I don’t trust Trump so if he told us the vaccine was available I would not take it. I do not trust him.

Lastly, I was asked to identify three times in your life when your feeling of phthonos interfered with your ability to lead.

I can think of a few situations where my resentment or envy for someone affected my leadership abilities. One time was when I was in high school and I was the captain of the step team . Since technically we were considered a club, we only had a teacher who volunteered to watch us during practice, other than that we were on our own. As captain everything was my responsibility ; making the schedule, making routines, booking engagements , and communicating with the girls , everything was just on me . I didn’t have a teacher to help me and usually there is someone above you to guide you because at the end of the day you are still a child, but that was not the case here. So as drama started to occur on the team I had to handle it myself. Trying to be the peacemaker and a leader at the same time is difficult. It’s hard to critique your friends or get to the bottom of something without looking biased . In addition , my own feelings of anger and resentment started to build up. It was not easy leading, I had to take some time and distance to get myself together and be the leader that I knew I could be. Just because there’s a bump in the road does not mean give up.

Another time that I can think of where my feelings got in the way of me leading is at my dance school. There was a point in my life where I had a lot going on with me mentally and everyone could tell. The place that was my safe haven, my outlet , became a toxic environment for me. I dated someone who attended my dance school as well, and when we ended things went south. Because I did not fully resolve the negative emotions I had towards her they begin to slip out and I begin to act out . I was not acting like a leader and I let my feelings take over my better judgment. It took months to overcome these feelings and actually resulted in me leaving dance for a little. I did back and still to this day believe that that was the best decision for me because you cannot heal in the same environment that broke you. I needed a change of scenery and even though this decision broke my heart it freed my soul .

Lastly another time with my feelings of anger got in the way of my leadership position is when I used to dance at my church. At church I used to be in charge of the youth dance ministry and I took the job very seriously. But as I got older I started to see the hypocritical behaviors in the church. The difference between what is taught and what is practiced, and I did not like that. So I started distancing myself, first not dancing anymore , then slowly by slowly I stopped attending church. Corona helped too because during the outbreak all churches were shut down and although churches were doing virtual seminars it was easier not to attend. I am still a Christian and believe in Christ. I just don’t believe that you have to attend a church to be one. Your body is a temple and you can praise god anywhere. Of course it is definitely a plus if you attend church and can receive prayer from your fellow sisters and brothers, but it is definitely not needed.

It is crazy that I was asked to now imagine three situations in the coming weeks when I might feel phthonos toward someone such that it interferes with your leadership because on saturday I decided to go back to dance. I already felt the tension being back but my mindset has changed . I now know what not every situation deserves a reaction, and that is how things will be different this time. Things will not have so much power over me.

Before I read Xenophon’s Cyrus II (“the Great”) , I jotted down some key terms that would help me translate the story. The terms are as follows. Genea stands for lineage. Cyrus is the son of the king of Persia (Cambyses) and the grandson of the king of Media (Astyages, whose daughter, Mundane, is Cyrus’ mother). Phūsis means nature. Morphē stands for a shape, physical form, or body. A fun fact is the word metamorphosis in English, means “a changing of form”. Kallos stands for beauty and or sexual attractiveness. Psuchē stands for soul, spirit, or life. Philanthrōpia is the love of humanity, which includes fond feeling, sociability, affection, and generosity. Philomatheia is the love of learning, which includes curiosity and the ability to learn things quickly. Philotīmia is the love of being honored, recognized, praised, or memorialized. Philokindunia is the love of danger (or a propensity to take risks); these risks could include threats to one’s reputation, one’s fortune (or resources), and one’s life. Philoponia is the love of toil or willingness to toil, e.g., work harder than others and lose sleep. Paideia means education both in the sense of learning various skills but also building character .Dikaiosunē is the ability to judge well; keeping to one’s agreements. Sōphrosunē means emotional restraint, especially the emotions that may distract us. For example; fear, anger, lust, pity. Enkrateia means bodily self-mastery over things like hunger, thirst, loss of sleep. Praotēs means gentleness, particularly in the area of rivalry and criticism . The person with praotes will not be bothered by the excellence of others and will not get upset when others criticize them. Phthonos means a feeling of hostility (sometimes translated as “resentment” or “envy”) toward someone who has violated your “airspace”. Airspace can refer to your personal space, your personal property, or your identity, particularly in a social space. Phronēsis means wisdom, forethought, or prudence. It’s the ability to predict or know “how things are going to go” if a certain behavior or plan of action is attempted.

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